Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize
