I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Randomize
