ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
