Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
