I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
