yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Randomize
