Well douche your snatch and let's go!
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
