I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
