well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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