My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
