Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Randomize
