We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Randomize
