Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
