Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
