after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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