Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
honey bunches of taint.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
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