i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
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