There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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