genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
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