the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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