grandma shit on top of the toilet
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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