I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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