Your mouth is God's brothel.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Randomize