cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
