I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
PANTIES FOUND
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