I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
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