would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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