Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
wanna go halves on a baby?
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
