dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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