I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
