well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Randomize
