I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
