Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
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