i would punch a child for taco bell
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
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