Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I need a hoe opinion
go on
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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