Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
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