6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Randomize
