I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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