so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Randomize
