Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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