you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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