If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
