well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
This couple is walking their pig around campus
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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