O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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