listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
Randomize
