I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
