Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
