Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Randomize
