we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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