Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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